Poor parents: kids loved rivalryTrouble:
Chi Heng's parents worried that after high school, more and more like wrestling and parents on the child, no matter what their parents do and say what he will challenge. Often very extreme views, so that both parents could not accept. And the classics, some parents admit that he was right. One night in order to make fathers accept their point of view "reading classics are of no value," insisted father and I debated it for three hours, prompting father angry, can't help but call him "unreasonable, nonsense". If the mother was not there, he will repeat the same arguments again and again listen to MOM. For some occasion also vowed to repair person. Children not previously so stubborn, impulsive and violent, what's going on here?
Parents are masters of the Chi Heng, from various events from his experience in the analysis of errors, deficiencies, criticism, Zhi-Heng to continuously improve. Chi Heng heart there is not convinced, but parents have never said he seemed always wrong, always good enough. Chi Heng started puberty in a stubborn manner for their autonomy and parent approval, and the way he uses it is commonly used by parents: analysis, identification, criticism.
Hu Wenyu ("Tao teacher hotline" tutor) in adolescence, with physical and mental development, in the eyes of parents in the past "small children", is at a stage of regaining self awareness, he tried to prove his own opinion by various means, is not always dependent on their parents, completely follow your parents ' child. Things out of the ordinary for this child was proved when I grew up, there are important ways of thinking, values, and there are many young people who value the idea. Sometimes, they uphold the views and parents, also intended to adhere to the opposite point of view, as if "in order to raise objection". This is the adolescence of stubbornness.
"I must my parents that I am right" looks like this in a way that's a bit extreme, but parents should first see them behind the positive significance and psychological needs. If you insist on correcting erroneous views, must be the arguments on both sides that followed, more offensive against child, parent-child relations are strained. Then give him ten minutes to present their ideas, parents agree with expressions of support and recognition, extreme section can be avoided for the time being. Select another time a problem comes up for discussion, and also possible next time a child is no longer adhere to extremist views.
When a child is in an extreme emotional state, the parents have to remain stable, scolding and accusations led to their children more emotional. If a term is in this State will cause mental instability, anger, irritability. Logical course of action is to guide adjusting the mood. For most children, this is a sign of puberty temporarily, parents don't have to worry too much.
Family is the child primary places of learning, children learn from parents in their daily lives to people on the way, perspectives and attitudes. Not satisfied with parents who may wish to consider from this angle. When parents are able to use positive, understood, accepted way to communicate with their children, may also be used as a child showed more ways to express their inner needs. From the child's point of view, consider the case of persistent debate and cannot really get parental approval and appreciation, instead they will disagree, there is nothing more reasonable ways to reach more wishes? Can communicate with students and see what they will use some good idea.