Parents will reads: third-favorite six wordsPerhaps you've never thought about, and help yourself to spoken word, little heart had a great impact on children. So what will solve the problem and let the children happy magic, and what words should be forever erased from our minds then?
Even the same message, you choose what kind of expression and what kind of words will have a great influence on children--even if you think they sometimes did not hear what you are saying.
In the course of interacting with children, whether you are requested to answer, or speak to him, conditions, reach a compromise. Your statement may make children more co-operative and more confident, but it can also make them feel frustrated and lose confidence.
So what will solve the problem and let the children happy magic, and what words should be forever erased from our brains?
1, "you make the decision. "
If you want your child to do something or stop doing something, we suggest that you say that. Say this in order to let the children know: he should be responsible for their actions.
For example, you can say to your daughter and her friends: "you make the decision because I want to stay here quietly, still to go out? "Five minutes later, children still make much noise, you can tell them:" I've got it, you decide to go out. "
Very simple two words, you not only make the children understand the antecedents and consequences of the relationship, you will not be seen by his daughter as a "bad COP"-she can understand very clearly: is her own decision, they had chosen such an outcome.
2, "I love you, but my mother doesn't like you do. "
As parents, always sometimes accuse them of. This time, the most important thing is to be itself--separate from the people who do things this way, your child will know that you've done a bad thing, but that does not mean he is a bad person.
Is criticizing the kid and tell him "I love you", it can also remind you, criticize the child to help him distinguish between right and wrong, rather than punish him. If so, you are more likely to remain calm in front of child's mistakes.
3, "what you are trying to say? "
Sometimes, children being angry or excited and feeling out of control, he was unable to say how you feel, just keep yelling: "I don't want you! "" I hate you! "At that instant, the poor little guy is only able to think of these words. This time, we need you to help kids better understand and express their feelings.
In addition to gently asked, "what you are trying to say? "You can also give him some sample answers:" you are angry is because Bob brother reveal your secrets? "Your child will gradually learn to understand their feelings, so, even if you're not there, he can clearly express their feelings to the people around.
4, "you try to help me with this problem. "
If your child is doing things that make you angry--at dinner kept humming kindergarten learn new songs, or vegetables in the fingers trying to paint a picture--you might say. Said as if it was about yourself, then ask your child to help you think of a way out. For example: the idea is to eat a meal, you start washing dishes when he sings to you.
This is a magic sentence, it can make children feel welcome and respected, so that he could not think of you as his opposite. If you satisfied with the only solution is to completely stop what you're doing, then you can work something out so the children could remember what happened at what time can do.
5, "different people have different needs. "
"Sissy doll, so I have one. "" Bob Dad let him eat the ice cream, then I can also eat ", which is the most commonly used children to bargain with your simple logic.
In situations like this, you have to clearly tell him: "different people with different needs. "You want them to understand," only when he really needed to get everybody. "For example, the little sister got glasses next door, doesn't mean that all the children were in the building can get glasses. Cousin's shoes were small, does not mean that all the brothers and sisters need to buy a new pair of shoes.